The truth about anxiety and perfectionism.

There are so many people suffering from perfectionism anxiety. And when you think about it – it makes sense. You’re trying to accomplish your goals and dreams in a world that’s often scary and unpredictable, so why wouldn’t you want to claw back some control?

The truth is it just doesn’t work like that. The desire to be perfect comes loaded with a lot of pressure. If you can only accomplish something in the ‘correct’ way, then you’re setting yourself up to fail. When in reality the imperfect things can often be the best, and most relatable! It’s easy to put other people on a pedestal, to look at their achievements and think ‘wow, they have the perfect life,’ but who knows, they could be burnt out, struggling and feel exactly the same as you.

Social media doesn’t help with this perfectionist anxiety. In a world where the people with the most polished, curated content get the most followers it’s easy to try and strive for that. But people are starting to go against the grain, particularly the mental health community on Instagram. I really enjoy seeing the raw honesty and creativity that so many people are sharing.

When you’re in a perfectionism socially anxious mindset it’s harder to be creative. If you start overthinking what you do, then you might dislike the little imperfections that make something heartfelt and beautiful. So be brave and try to go with the flow, accept that you are unique, and that’s a good thing!

Change is scary. Here’s how you cope with it.

The seasons are changing, and the days are getting shorter and colder. (I’m not a fan!) So, it seems a fitting time to talk about coping with change. If you’re anything like me then you’re probably happy to float along in your comfort zone, as anxiety can make it feel impossible to do things differently. But the thing is, life is constantly evolving and changing – whether we like it or not!

Acknowledge it

Change can come as a result of taking on a new challenge or simply having it thrown in your path at random, but the first step in dealing with it is acknowledgement. Take a deep breath and say, OK this is the situation, it might feel uncomfortable right now, but I have the tools and inner strength to cope with it.

Reach out

But what if I don’t?! I hear you cry, well, that’s where the next step comes in. Reach out and talk to people. Talking to a friend or relative about how you’re feeling can really help to put things into perspective, after all even good changes can be stressful. Having that extra moral support can give you the confidence to keep going.

Stick to a routine

Change can make you feel like everything is out of your control, so now’s the time to think about the things you can control. Stick to your routine as much as possible, have that first cup of tea of the day, get into your pjs and watch TV in the evening; do anything that gives you a sense of comfort.

Take action

I’ve noticed that taking action really helps me. I will quite often sit and scroll through social media, with a lot of worries festering away in the back of my mind. When I get up and do an activity, like going on a walk, gardening or cooking a meal, my worries dissolve a little as I focus on the task at hand. It’s worth a try when you get stuck in an anxious loop.

Expect the best, but plan for the worst

Having a plan of action can help you feel more in control. Think about what you’ll do if things don’t go to plan but also bear in mind everything you have to gain from the situation. I think there’s a lot of truth in this quote from motivational speaker Steve Maraboli:

“Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t.”

Have faith in yourself, you can do this!